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IDKM Shocker of the Day by idontknowmuch

 Jamie Lynn Spears

The Sun UK is reporting that Jamie Lynn Spears was an accident, just like the baby she’s carrying. What a wonderful family tradition. Jamie Lynn’s uncle William, speaking from his residence in a ‘camper van’, was interviewed by the British tabloid this week.

The Sun reports:

Jamie (the father) was shocked when he found out wife Lynne was pregnant (with Jamie Lynn) as he had a vasectomy after she gave birth to Britney, their second child…..Jamie demanded a DNA test, that eventually proved he was the baby’s biological father.  William added, “That’s why they named her Jamie Lynn, to kind of make the point that she was from both of them.”

So, lets get this straight. Jamie Lynn was conceived after her father was snipped. A DNA test later proved that Jamie was Jamie Lynn’s father. Then, they decided to name Jamie Lynn after both parents to ‘make the point’ that the daughter was from both of them.

My head is going to explode.

First, what does it say about the Spears’ family ability to reproduce if the men in the family aren’t even stopped by vasectomy? Rich, intelligent, loving people who would make great parents struggle to get pregnant, and this tribe of retards has a baby every time a man and woman in the family hold hands. Second, who performed the vasectomy–one of Uncle Willie’s friends from the trailer park? Third, the Spears family knew about DNA testing in 1991, when Lynn was pregnant with her now knocked up teen daughter? I highly doubt that. They probably think ‘DNA test’ stands for ‘Don’t (K)Now Anyone’ else who could have gotten me pregnant. And finally, after a supposed DNA test ruled that Jamie was the father of this little miracle, they still felt the need to name the baby Jamie Lynn to make a point that she was from both of them? What, the paternity test wasn’t enough? Giving the kid that name is the final nail in the coffin of proof?

And lets not forget, the source on this story is Uncle Willie from the camper van. Is there any wonder how this family is so completely fucked up?