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Reggie, Can I Speak to You? by phattyjboy

Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush

“Umm dude. You having trouble talking to girls? No, no I’m just wondering. Reggie, settle down. I’m just asking cuz…..well she fell off dude. Don’t get me wrong, I love a big ass just as much as the next man, but are you kidding me? And I know it can’t be about the money. You make yours, right? Right. So what the hell is going on here? Every black man that has made at least $100,000 in the last year has been inside this bitch. You think you’re gonna change her? And if you did, then why can’t she get her ass on a treadmill? Or jog around her backyard? Isn’t she supposed to be a model or some shit? Now I know you think you love her, but give me a break.”

“Reggie. Reggie! Go get your jacket. We’re going to the club. I’ll get you a phat ass. P-H-fat. Or even a fat ass. But they must have slaughtered a herd or a gaggle or whatever the hell a group of zebras is called to make those bikini bottoms. Reggie, you stop it. Stop crying. Man this is what you don’t need to do. Did you see what happened to T-Ro last year? That bitch done fucked him up. Going down to Mexico and shit. I should slap both of you retarded.”

(In case you were wondering, I’m not friends with Reggie and I don’t called Tony Romo “T-Ro”, and if I did, I’d never let you know that. That’s just plain dumb).

Gallery: Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush 2 Kim Kardashian by herself Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush