Phillippe as Shocked as Me by idontknowmuch


Ryan Phillippe can’t believe that his ex-wife, Reese Witherspoon, is dating Jake Gyllenhaal, according to People.

“It’s bizarre……There’s plenty of times when I say, ‘What a strange situation I’ve found myself in,’ ” Phillippe said. “But at a certain point you know it’s going to happen, so you are prepared.” The actor added that he avoids looking at photos of Witherspoon and her new boyfriend.

Ryan went on to add, “Its also bizarre because, ya know, Jake is gay. Like, mad gay, son. And I’m not just saying that because he was in a gay cowboy movie. I mean, Heath wasn’t gay. But Jake Gyllenhaal……that dude is as gay as the day is long. Richard Simmons told me that he thinks Jake should butch up a bit. I don’t know if Reese could of picked a worse actor to try to make me jealous with. Seriously. He’s definitely not fucking her. And if he is, he’s hating every minute of it.”

Phillippe then added, “Well, I gotta go. I have an appointment to go fuck a hot actress like Abbie Cornish on top of a pile of money. See ya.”