Filed under: Jane Carrey, Jenny McCarthy, Jim Carrey | Tags: Celebrities, entertainment, Gossip, Hollywood, I hope she really cares about autistic kids, I'd hit it, Jane Carrey, Jenny McCarthy's best friend, Jim Carrey's daughter, News

Since today is perv day on this blog, I figured I’d post some pictures of Jane Carrey, Jim Carrey’s daugher, at the premiere of “Horton Hears a Who” in California on Saturday. She is very attractive and if I was really interested in finding out who her mother was, I’d Google her, but that sounds completely illegal.
But then I said fuck it and Googled her anyways. Her mother is Jim’s first wife, former Comedy Store waitress Melissa Womer. And I also found out that she’s 20 and a lead singer of the “Jane Carrey Band” so now I don’t feel as bad about Googling anything. Check out her band playing when they first started:
I wonder what Jane REALLY thinks about her dad banging Jenny McCarthy. First her dad left her mom for Jim’s “Dumb and Dumber” co-star Lauren Holly and now he’s dating a form Playmate. Granted they’re photographed spending alot of time together, especially at autism benefits because Jenny’s son is autistic, but I bet its just because she’s trying to establish a music career. Selfish bitch. Using a poor autistic kid who’s mother was in Playboy multiple times to become famous. How do you sleep at night?
Would you hit it? Aaaaaaalllllllrighty then!
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Filed under: Food, Jessica Alba, Pregnant Hotties | Tags: Celebrities, entertainment, Gossip, Jessica Alba loves hot ham and cheese's, my family makes those at every family party, they're great drunk food

Jessica Alba has been craving ham and cheese sandwiches and that kinda turns me on. Excerpt from her MySpace blog:
“Every day I have eaten ham and cheese sandwiches, I can’t get enough of them. Wish they had these back in the states, the bread is amazing. My tummy is getting bigger by the second and the little one must like the food too because it is moving and kicking like crazy. ITS THE BEST.”
My lovely Alba-cakes is over in Paris promoting her shitty movie “The Eye”. And while I’m sure that French people know how to make a mean ham ‘n’ cheese sandwich, I’ll fly their special ham and cheese in and buy a damn baguette and I’m sure I could come pretty close. Thats why I asked Jessica to be her MySpace friend. I know I’m better than that douchebag, Cash Warren. Who the hell is named Cash and isn’t just a complete prick.
“Come here, Jessie. Here’s another hot hammie sammie. No, I won’t bite. At least not too hard. Please.”
God, I’m creepy.
(P.S. Don’t bitch about another pregnant picture on this site. She may not even be pregnant. That might be a whole hog in there with melted Gruyere. Thats right. Gruyere, bitches).
Filed under: Katie Price/Jordan, Stupid Bitches | Tags: Celebrities, did she take out her fakes?, doesn't look like it here, entertainment, Gossip, im ugly, Katie Price is Jordan is Katie Price

I’ve seen pictures of this whore slut tramp girl before and my reaction was “just another girl with fake tits.” I think she’s the one that recently had them removed, but I don’t care to verify that. She does have a pretty nice body though.
So why the other models you ask? Because this chick is the semi-hot chick from high school with small tits that you see five years later and she’s smoking with a huge rack. Buuuuuuuut she’s still hanging out with the ugly girls to make herself feel better, so that she always gets the attention. She doesn’t really care about you, girls. Bravo for going up there as natural women. I know if I did a similar photoshoot in my Speedo, there would be no way anyone would buy more Speedos. I’m pretty sure their stock price would drop so far that they would have to restructure the company and fire tons of people.
And I don’t want to put anyone out of a job, now do i?
Filed under: Eva Mendes, Stay Hot Kid | Tags: Celebrities, entertainment, Eva Mendes is FREE, Gossip, I'm definitely attracted to females of the Latin persua, quote overload, rehab, Shake it mama

There’s my Eva. I’m glad she had a nice relaxing purge at the trendy “rehab” a couple weeks ago. Girl looks gooooood. Come to think of it, everyone that comes out “rehab” looks pretty good. At least this rehab. I swear to god this place is just a spa that they market as rehab. People can go there, drink and smoke themselves retarded, and then come out feeling better because they probably are better than 99% of the other people in there.
Why are they better, you ask? They get paid millions to take pictures and make movies just because of their looks. You don’t see any unattractive artists or musicians coming out of that place, do you? Hell no. They’re on TV with Dr. Drew. Its probably in his contract that he can’t send “those people” within 25 miles of that place.
(By the way, I apologize for the all the quotation marks. I don’t “really” know how to use them).
Eva Gallery:
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Filed under: Adriana Lima, Hayden Panettiere, Jessica Simpson, Kristin Cavallari, Patrick Swayze, Rachael Ray, Rock of Love 2, That's Amore! | Tags: Adriana Lima is my dream girl, Can't wait for Wolverine, Celebrities, entertainment, Gossip, One Liners, Rachael Ray doesn't really care what her husband does
- Kristin Cavallari might be a dumb bitch, but she’s still hot (DrunkenStepfather)
- Of course Rachael Ray is a bitch and her husband has a foot fetish (DListed)
- “Rock of Love 2″ and “That’s Amore!” amuse the shit out of me (DListed)
- Ms. Simpson only publicly screwed three of these guys, but we know she did all of them (DListed)
- Wait a second: Who forget Adriana Lima? Not me (Hollywood Tuna)
- Nerd spoiler alert: Wolverine v.s. Sabertooth pics (Just Jared)
- I’m not so sure about Ms. Panettiere anymore (Just Jared)
- Top 20 Swayze faces in ‘Ghost’ (Best Week Ever)
Filed under: Kate Hudson, Stay Hot Kid | Tags: Celebrities, entertainment, Gossip, her son is precious get it?, Kate Hudson bikini pictures, nice butts, wow mommy

Wow she’s definitely got…umm….talent. My question is: Why does her son resemble Gollum? And then my question to myself would be: Why the fuck do you care?
Ass-tastic:
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